Eulogy for my dad... a man of true faith.

My dad passed away on April 6, 2013.  I gave this eulogy at his funeral mass on April 9th:

Hello… most of you know that I am John’s youngest son Dan… or probably Danny to most of you. I’d like to sincerely thank you all for being here. Your presence, your prayers, your support, and your love are greatly appreciated. I recently read a quote saying that, “Our family tree… is full of nuts.” I know, however, that my family tree is full of tremendously warm-hearted people that have loved and supported us in countless ways over the years. A special thanks to all my aunts and uncles on both sides of the family for being there for all of us. Beyond that we have some amazing family friends who have also been a rock for me and my family. Thank you Fr. Walt for all that you do for us and allowing me to speak for a few minutes about my father. Thank you to Nancy, Stephanie, and the choir for the beautiful music.


Before I talk about my dad, I’d like to take a minute to recognize my mom. Mom… your selfless, unceasing love for dad has been amazing. It’s a blessing to all of us to have witnessed your care and compassion for dad and I want to thank you for all that you’ve done for him and all that you do for our family. We all love you very much.

My dad married my mom over 45 years ago but it’s worth noting that she wasn’t my dad’s first love… his first love would be food! When he was a little boy in the hospital, I believe for getting his tonsils removed, a nurse called his mother and said, “Mrs. Bender, your son John keeps saying ‘yammich, yammich’ and we don’t know what he wants.” My grandmother replied, “oh, he wants a ham sandwich!”

If his first love was food, his second love would have been baseball. He grew up in the golden-age of baseball in the 40’s and 50’s and watched the greats like Joe DiMaggio, Bob Feller, and Ted Williams. As the Indians were on their way to winning 111 games and the American League pennant in 1954, my dad was beginning his freshman year at Benedictine High School. The rule of St. Benedict is “ora et labora”, which means “prayer and work.” I would bet that when my dad tried out for the Freshman Baseball team, he worked really hard and prayed that he’d make the team but as fate would have it, he got cut by legendary Benedictine coach Augie Bossu. Not sure if he ever got over that but as they say, when one door closes, God opens another.

That other door for my dad was working for the Indians on the grounds crew at old Municipal Stadium. He got to meet and speak with his boyhood heroes and had a front row seat to a part of Americana that is deemed sacred in some circles. Beyond that, this job of his gave ME bragging rights over three decades later when I debated my 3rd grade buddies as to who had the coolest dad.

After graduating from high school in ’58, my dad left town and joined the U.S. Navy on June 30, 1958. He was always proud of his service and spoke very fondly of his time in the Navy. He told me it was the best time of his life. The Navy gave him “four square meals a day” which went nicely with that “first love” I mentioned a moment ago and the Navy also allowed a kid from Parma Heights to see the world and begin to grow into the man he’d become.

When his Navy days were over, he came home and began working and going to college at night. One night, sometime after my grandfather passed away, my dad made the decision to go out for the evening after spending many nights at home with his widowed mother. He ventured over to the Cloverleaf Bowling Lanes that night and met a gal from Garfield who liked to sip on an occasional highball… He had met my mom, his third love if you will.

My parents were married on August 26, 1967 at Sts. Peter and Paul Church and I know many of you were there that summer day. They moved into a new home on Sarasota Blvd. in Parma and celebrated their first anniversary by changing my brother John’s diapers. My parents celebrated their second anniversary by changing John AND Eric’s diapers! And if my math is right, I think they celebrated their third anniversary by making my brother Mark… and of course changing more diapers. Finally, in May of ’74, my parents finally got their daughter when my sister Colleen was born. Fast forward to 1980, after much thoughtful planning and discernment, my parents made the very deliberate decision to have a fifth child…. Me! At least that’s what I like to believe. It all worked out.

In between my sister’s arrival and mine, the Benders moved to Brecksville. My dad loved everything about this town where he spent the rest of his life. Some of the best friends my parents ever had were our neighbors in White Oaks. My dad was actually the treasurer for the neighborhood beautification association and took great pride in his neighborhood and city.

Another thing he cherished about Brecksville was this parish. My dad was a faithful and proud Catholic. Every Sunday morning he had us here no matter how tired or busy we were. For a period of time he would help count and reconcile the Sunday collection until he switched roles into what Vegas would call a more of a, “front-off-the-house” ministry and became an usher at 10:30 mass. In fact, Fr. Walt, I am a little surprised that given my dad’s history here, we didn’t take up some sort of collection today!

When we left Mass, my dad did NOT stop instilling the faith in us. He used to remind me all the time of the words from the gospel that, “to whom much is given, much is expected.” Those words have always stuck with me and in realizing the wonderful family I’ve been blessed with, the good education I’ve received, and the opportunities presented before me, I am driven not only do the best I can for myself but also give back to a world which has given me so much.

My dad also taught us that being part of a family meant that you contribute. I recall one summer when I was about ten years old. I had been mowing our lawn for a little but had recently heard that some of my friends were making money for cutting their own grass. I asked my dad about throwing me a few bucks and to my surprise, he quickly agreed to give $20 each time I mowed the lawn. Then, without missing a beat, he then informed me that dinner would cost $15 and if I wanted a place to sleep, that would be $40 per night…. Showers were extra. I got the point.

Most guys have a hobby. Fishing.. Playing golf… whatever. My dad did not have a hobby. With a wife and five kids, if he wasn’t working selling software or payroll or whatever he was selling that year, he was being a husband and a dad. He was either coaching John and Eric’s baseball team, driving Mark to a BMX bike race, attending one of Colleen’s plays, or watching my football games… whatever it was, he tried to be there. If he had a hobby, it would have been cutting out coupons and grocery shopping. He also loved heading down to the Food Terminal early in the morning to buy a giant box of potatoes or oranges. We’d keep about half and then my dad would have me run bags full of produce to our neighbors. That’s another thing about my dad… he was generous and his way of saying he loved you was to make sure you were well fed.

I have many wonderful memories of my dad that I pray never fade. Lots of memories of watching games, sitting around the dinner table, or whatever. He was very nostalgic and loved telling, then retelling those stories over and over. However, if I had to distinguish one memory in particular, it would be from about five or six years ago before his health really began to decline. One Sunday, the entire family was over my parent’s house for some reason. We grilled out and had a nice dinner on a summer evening. After we ate, I found myself sitting on the back patio with my dad. He had requested that we put on a CD by “The Three Tenors.” When their version of Frank Sinatra’s “I Did It My Way” came on, he asked that we turn it up louder. Now, with Pavarotti and company blaring at 120 decibels so that the entire neighborhood could hear, my dad sat with an introspective look in his eyes and a smile on his face. He looked around at his family and at his grandkids that were catching lightening bugs in the backyard as the sun set. As twilight approached, I could tell he knew he was approaching the twilight of his life. I saw a beautiful sense of accomplishment in my father’s eyes as looked around at all of us. He was looking at his legacy… a legacy of love that he had built… a legacy of love built “his way.”

Now back to that rule of the Benedictines… Ora et Labora… Prayer and Work. As today’s second reading says, my dad will rest from his labor yet his good works will go with him. No more work for him, no more pain, no more dialysis, and no more hospitals. No more suffering. But there is still prayer. We pray that God’s angels usher my dad into the dwelling place that Jesus has promised and prepared for him that we heard proclaimed in today’s gospel. Beyond that, I ask for all of your prayers. Please pray for me, my mom, and all my family that we might know God’s comfort and peace and somehow learn to live without having our father nearby.

This is the Easter season and we are truly people of the resurrection. We can take comfort in just saying “see you later” to our dad, and not “good bye.”

In closing, I will say this… My dad loved. Sometimes he was blunt, stubborn and impatient but he made us laugh. He was old-school. He had his convictions and didn’t compromise on what he believed to be right. My dad sacrificed to provide for his family and did that without hesitation. In the midst of financial hardship and being out of work, he still put money in the basket every Sunday and taught us how to trust in God’s providence. He was witty, he was loyal, and he was my hero. He was one of a kind. My dad cared for all of us and he prayed for all of us. He was faithful husband, a wonderful father, and a loving grandpa. Whether you knew him as a brother, an uncle, a cousin, a neighbor, or as a friend, we are all blessed to have known John Bender.

Dad, I know you can hear me and I just want to say “thank you.” You served your community, your parish, and your country. You served your family and served the Lord. And Dad, more, much more than this, you did it your way. We love you.

Thank you and God Bless.

Forgiveness Part Four- St. Maria Goretti forgiving the unforgivable

The attempted rape and fatal stabbing of a 11-year-old girl can be described in a lot of ways: appalling, vile, evil, disturbing, despicable. To many, it would be described as unforgivable.

However, to the 11-year-old girl who was the victim, those actions were anything but unforgivable.

Maria Goretti was born on October 6, 1890. She was the third of six children in a poor Italian family. On the afternoon of July 5, 1902, the young girl was sewing by herself when Alessandro Serenelli came in and threatened her with death if she did not do as he said; he was intending to rape Maria. She would not submit, however, protesting that what he wanted to do was a mortal sin and warning Alessandro that he would go to Hell. She desperately fought to stop Alessandro, a 19-year-old farmhand, from abusing her. Maria kept screaming, "No! It is a sin! God does not want it!" Alessandro first choked Maria, but when she insisted she would rather die than submit to him, he stabbed her eleven times. The injured Maria tried to reach for the door, but Alessandro stopped her by stabbing her three more times before running away.

The following day, July 6th the young girl died from the attack. However, before she she passed away, Maria forgave Alessandro and expressed a desire for them to be reunited in Heaven. As she took her last breaths, she gazed at a picture of the Virgin Mary.

Alessandro Serenelli was captured shortly after Maria's death. He was sentenced to 30 years in prison. He remained unrepentant and uncommunicative from the world for three years, until a local bishop, Monsignor Giovanni Blandini, visited him in jail. Serenelli wrote a thank you note to the Bishop asking for his prayers and telling him about a dream he had in which Maria Goretti gave him lilies, which burned immediately in his hands.

After his release, Alessandro Serenelli visited Maria's still-living mother, Assunta, and begged her forgiveness. She forgave him, saying that if Maria had forgiven him on her deathbed then she couldn't do less. They attended Mass together the next day, receiving Holy Communion side by side. Alessandro reportedly prayed every day to Maria Goretti and referred to her as "my little saint." Serenelli later became a laybrother of the Order of the Friars Minor Capuchin, living in a monastery and working as its receptionist and gardener until dying peacefully in 1970.

Maria was canonized by Pope Pius XII in 1950. In attendence that day was Alessandro. It is clear to see how this very young Saint lived the gospel in those two days in history. Her commitment to chastity and willingness to forgive the young man who brutally took her life is inspiring. In a world that preaches "don't get mad, get get even," the story of St. Maria Goretti is story which needs be shared and celebrated.

There is a very true saying that says "to error is human, to forgive is divine." I believe that to be true but St. Maria Goretti shows us that forgiveness is not mutually exclusive to our loving Father in Heaven. She lived the Christian virtues of mercy and forgiveness. I think we can all learn something from this 11-year-old.

*St. Maria Goretti's feast day is July 6th. She is the patron saint for victims of crime and young girls.

Pan de Vida

Jesus said to the Jewish crowds: "I am the living bread that came down from heaven; whoever eats this bread will live forever; and the bread that I will give is my flesh for the life of the world." The Jews quarreled among themselves, saying,"How can this man give us his flesh to eat?" Jesus said to them,"Amen, amen, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you do not have life within you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him on the last day. For my flesh is true food, and my blood is true drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I have life because of the Father, so also the one who feeds on me will have life because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven. Unlike your ancestors who ate and still died, whoever eats this bread will live forever." -John 6: 51-5

I think my mom's all time favorite communion song is "Pan de Vida" which is the Spanish translation for "Bread of Life." The passage above from St. John's gospel is part of what is known as The Bread of Life Discourse. It will be the Gospel reading this upcoming Sunday when the Catholic Church celebrates the Solemnity of the Most Holy Body and Blood of Christ (also known as the Feast of Corpus Christi). In that bread of life discourse, Jesus Christ teaches that the Eucharist that He instituted for our sake at the Last Supper isn't just a symbol of Him, as he says "whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life." The Eucharist and Precious Blood truly are the body, blood, soul, and divinity of Jesus... God Incarnate.

Many people today, even some church going Catholics, don't accept this doctrine. We rely on our senses that still taste and see unleavened bread and wine. Admittedly, it requires a great amount of faith to believe that the we are truly receiving the body and blood of Christ. The fact that many people reject this doctrine shouldn't be surprising. If you were to read the rest of chapter six of John's gospel you'd read that even many of Christ's initial followers could not accept His teaching on this point and "returned to their former life and no longer accompanied Jesus" as a result.

So as I sat down to share some thoughts on the upcoming Solemnity I wondered what could I write that might help the readers of this Blog come to a deeper belief in the Eucharist. I thought of quoting the Catechism of the Catholic Church. I thought to maybe explore what Blessed John Paul II meant when he described the Eucharist as "The Source and Summit of the Faith." Perhaps I could describe some of the documented miracles of the Eucharist. There are other parts of scripture that could be referenced and many reflections of Saints to be considered to. However, I feel that the Holy Spirit would actually rather me discuss my mom's favorite communion song.... Pan de Vida.

You see, whenever I hear "Pan de Vida" (which has both Spanish and English lyrics), I begin to recall the mission trip to Honduras that I was blessed to go on a few years ago. My parish has had a partnership with a parish in Honduras and over the past decade we've sent groups of parishioners down there. Usually the groups go down about three times per year and typically stay one to two weeks. The scope of these mission trips can vary but usually there are doctors and dentists in the teams who provide medical services to the Honduran people and usually there are construction efforts too. When I went, we built a small church but other groups have built water filtration systems, homes, and latrines all in an effort to improve the quality of life for the good people who live in a very impoverished nation.

To say the ten days I spent there had a profound impact on me would be a huge understatement. Different language, different landscape, different foods... seemingly, a different world. I quickly began to appreciate the paved roads and clean drinking water among other things that we in the U.S. take for granted. But despite some of the hardships, I had an amazing time. We worked through the language barrier to form friendships with the locals. We played tag with the kids and watched their eyes light up when receiving modest gifts like coloring books, candy, and bubbles. I got to see and experience things that I never did before and might never again.

However, it was something that I actually knew well and experienced many times before that trip which was the highlight of the entire experience for me. That familiar, yet indescribable, something was Sunday morning Mass. I didn't understand the readings that were done in Spanish and couldn't tell you what the Honduran priest spoke about in the homily. What I did know though is that that Heaven came down into that crowded church and by the power of the Holy Spirit, ordinary bread and wine were transformed into the body and blood of our Lord. As I came forward to receive Holy Communion, I knew exactly WHO I was receiving. I began thinking of all my brothers and sisters in Christ I was able to serve in the previous days. I also thought of all my friends and family who I had been away from for awhile who were back home doing the exact same thing... coming forward to the table of the Lord to receive the bread of life. Tears began welling up in my eyes as I contemplated the teaching of Christ to love God and love our neighbor. I realized that the sun never goes down on our Holy Catholic Church and our neighbors live all over the world and speak all types languages.

You see, a lot of grapes are needed to make wine and a lot of grains of wheat are needed to make bread. And while you may just represent one grape or one grain of wheat, we come together with millions and millions others to form the Church... the mystical body of Christ. In receiving Him, He receives everyone of us. Communion... that comes from two words: common and union. In Holy Communion we are all united with the Lord and one another.:One bread, one body.

My prayer is that we all come to a deeper appreciation for the Blessed Sacrament and a greater desire receive our spiritual food and drink. And in closing, remember what you learned growing up: you are what you eat!

Forgiveness Part Three- Pope John Paul II a reflection of Christ

I once heard this really great analogy that Jesus Christ is like the sun and the Saints of our Church are like the moon. For the moon is not the original source of light but it reflects the light of the sun in such a beautiful way. Pope John Paul II who will beatified today truly did reflect the light of Christ for all the world to see.

On May 13th, 1981, a man named Memhet Ali Ağca shot Pope John Paul II four times as the Pope walked across St. Peter's Square at Vatican City. The Pope lost three-quarters of his blood and underwent five hours of surgery to save his life.

Most people probably lack that grace required to forgive anyone who has tried to kill them. Not so for Pope John Paul II. Shortly after the shooting, the Pope said, "pray for my brother whom I have sincerely forgiven." Two years later in 1983, Pope John Paul II visited his attempted killer in prison and the two formed a relationship.

With Good Friday recent in our memories, we recall that while Jesus was dying on the cross, he said, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do." (Luke 23:34). Pope John Paul II was embodying the Spirit of Jesus in forgiving this man who tried to kill him. The Pope was following Christ's teachings to "love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you." (Matthew 5:44).

So today, on Divine Mercy Sunday, the man who many call "The Mercy Pope" will become Blessed Pope John Paul II. This great Vicar of Christ will be one step closer to officially being a Saint but I think we can all agree that this holy man of God reflected the light of Christ in many ways... especially in his desire and commitment to forgive.

Pope John Paul II... pray for us!

Forgiveness Part Two- How Often Must We Forgive?

March 29th was just two weeks ago. I bet many people have already forgotten what they did that day. However, if you are a dedicated fan of the Cleveland Cavaliers, I am almost sure you remember what happened that night.

That was the night that LeBron James and his Miami Heat teammates returned to Cleveland for the second time during the 2010-11 season. LeBron, who grew up in Akron and led the Cavs to much success during his first several seasons in the NBA, left Cleveland in the summer of 2010 and took his talents to South Beach. His first return to Cleveland was back in November and was much more hyped.

It was on national television and the fans of C-town got their chance to vocalize their feelings towards their former hero. To call it a hostile environment back in November would be a huge understatement. But to the chagrin of most everyone in Northeast Ohio (and many people across the country), LeBron and the Heat got the last laugh. The Cavs got down big and folded like a cheap tent.

So as I sat down to eat lunch on the 29th of March I started to think to myself. I wondered if the scene down at Quicken Loans arena would be any different. I wondered if any fans might just go overboard and try something crazy like attacking LeBron or throwing a hot dog at his head. The thought of hateful chants and derogatory signs entered my mind. And I'll admit it, being a Cleveland sports fan, a big part of me wanted it to happen. You see, guys like me who have spent their whole life in this city took his leaving for Miami as personal thing. Nine months after his departure I was still angry about the whole situation and I was sort of hoping those fans down at the Q would let him know about it.

At that very minute (probably because of the Holy Spirit), I felt compelled to do something my spiritual director had encouraged me to do... read the gospel reading for that day. I took out my Blackberry and pulled up the gospel reading from http://www.usccb.org/. Here is what I read:

Peter approached Jesus and asked him,“Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus answered, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times. That is why the Kingdom of heaven may be likened to a king who decided to settle accounts with his servants. When he began the accounting, a debtor was brought before him who owed him a huge amount. Since he had no way of paying it back, his master ordered him to be sold, along with his wife, his children, and all his property, in payment of the debt. At that, the servant fell down, did him homage, and said, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back in full.’ Moved with compassion the master of that servant let him go and forgave him the loan. When that servant had left, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a much smaller amount. He seized him and started to choke him, demanding, ‘Pay back what you owe.’ Falling to his knees, his fellow servant begged him,‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’ But he refused. Instead, he had him put in prison until he paid back the debt. Now when his fellow servants saw what had happened,they were deeply disturbed, and went to their master and reported the whole affair. His master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you your entire debt because you begged me to. Should you not have had pity on your fellow servant, as I had pity on you?’ Then in anger his master handed him over to the torturers until he should pay back the whole debt. So will my heavenly Father do to you, unless each of you forgives your brother from your heart.” (Matthew 18: 21-35)

All of sudden I had one of those moments. A moment where you want to say, "yeah, but God..." I felt like there should be a loophole. Forgiveness is good and all but we shouldn't have to forgive LeBron! Right?

I reflected on the things I was thinking just a moment earlier and how far off I was from truly living the gospel. I didn't feel too great about myself and I didn't like thinking that I was called to forgive LeBron. The reality is though, that is what Christ called his followers to do.

We all have different "LeBrons" in our lives. Not all of them are over 6' 8" and make millions of dollars each year. They come in the form of family members, friends, neighbors, former boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse, co-workers. Sometimes we are still carrying hurt from a fallout from years ago with a particular person. Sometime we are just mad at a nameless jerk who cut you off on the highway. At the end of the day, it's a pretty similar formula: somebody does or says something that hurts and angers you and the lasting effect is discord.

That discord does not solve anything. Those negative thoughts won't remedy the situation. Jesus knew this and He knew those are things the devil will use to rip marriages, families, friendships, communities, and ultimately God's world apart. Jesus tells us we shouldn't be keeping score. We ought not limit our forgiveness. Christ knew the true way to resolve the brokenness is through forgiveness.

And being the Son of God, Jesus Christ was wise enough to continue to tells us another reason why we need to forgive. In the scripture passage above, Christ basically says the servant should be forgiving since he was forgiven. Therefore, we, as forgiven sinners, must be forgiving. God is not a god of second or third chances... in His mercy He is a God of infinite chances. He is always there with open arms for us to return to Him. His request to us: Pay it forward. We can't forgive God since He is a perfect and loving father. We need to be mindful that despite the countless times we fail Him, He forgives us and we need then show that love and mercy to those who have failed us.

Forgiving isn't easy, but like most things that can be challenging, it is so worth it.

The Cavs won that night. That felt great. So does letting go of grudges and hatred.

Questions for reflection:

1) Do you take God's forgiveness of your own sins for granted or are truly grateful for His mercy?

2) Why might we take Christ's instruction to forgive those who have hurt us and to love our enemies lightly?

3) Who do you need to forgive? Have you asked God to help you forgive that person?

Five Questions with Fr. Joe

Here is the latest from Fr. Joe!

If you have a question about the Catholic faith, Church history, or just want a clarification on Catholic teaching, here is your chance. Even if you just want some advise on a situation that you are dealing with or need some guidance on your personal faith journey, here is an opportunity to do so. Just email your questions to blog.of.daniel@gmail.com or DBender45@yahoo.com

1) The Catholic Church is opposed to contraception because it negates the life giving power that is a major part marital union. Is it morally acceptable for one to use birth control if it is prescribed by a doctor for other medical conditions?

This is a very good question and one that happens with regular occurrence. The Church has always held a strong prohibition about the use of artificial birth control. This was re-affirmed in the 1968 document, Humane Vitae, by Pope Paul VI. Yet, in terms of using birth control for other reasons, within the same document, there is a line that states “on the other hand, the Church does not consider at all illicit the use of those therapeutic means necessary to cure bodily diseases, even if a foreseeable impediment to procreation should result there from—provided such impediment is not directly intended for any motive whatsoever (15) ". Given this provision, it would seem that as long as the rationale for the prescription was indeed for the medical problem, not to regulate birth, one would be allowed to use the medicine.

2) In the last "Five Questions with Fr. Joe," you mentioned the only sin that is unforgivable is a "sin against the Holy Spirit." This response generated some discussion amongst the readers of this blog. What exactly is a sin against the Holy Spirit and why can't it be forgiven? Is this referenced in the Bible?

Even though we commonly say, “sin against the Holy Spirit”, one can find a reference to blaspheming against the Holy Spirit, in the Catechism of the Catholic Church, #1864. Click here for a link to the paragraph. http://www.scborromeo.org/ccc/para/1864.htm. Scripturally, one finds references to this sin in Mark 3:29, Matthew 12:32, and Luke 12:10. In case you’re worried about committing it, I heard it said once that if you’ve worried about it, you’ve never committed it and probably won’t commit it either. It seems quite intentional to commit.

3) Catholics tend light candles in Churches and at other places (shrines, etc.) at the same time when they offer up a prayer to God. Why do we light candles and are there certain occasions when should or should not light a candle?

I’m not too sure where and when the practice of lighting candles began. However, I think it might be related to the idea of our prayers rising like incense before God, as we hear in Psalm 141. Just as incense rise to the heavens, the lights of candles illuminates and signifies our prayers “lit” before God. Sometimes, during Lent, parishes remove candles, but if there are candles out, one shouldn’t feel that they have to light or not them; whether they’re lit or not, God will hear our prayers.

4) Protestants reference certain scriptural passages in making the argument that priest should not be celibate. Furthermore, St. Peter, our first pope, was married and there were periods in the Church's history where priest were married. What is reason behind the vow of celibacy that priest take? Can you explain how this is a "discipline" and not a "dogma"?

While there are passages that suggest priests should not be celibate, there are passages that suggest some are given a grace to be celibate for the sake of the kingdom, see Matthew 19:12. This is one of those cases that both being married and celibate are to be respected as valued ways of living life. I think it’s important for us to see both marriage and celibacy as important ways of living one’s devotion to Christ. It’s not a dogma, but a discipline, because it doesn’t attain the same level of teaching on things such as the Blessed Virgin Mary and the Eucharist. One quick way of distinguishing, most dogmas are contained in the Nicene Creed, which disciplines are not. In terms of rationale behind the mandatory celibacy for priests, there are several reasons – some spiritual and some practical. One of the most practical, at times, when married priests were dying, Church property was being left to families and not the Church. Secondly, being unmarried allows for a great deal of freedom – it’s easier to move one person than an entire family to a new assignment. Now, it terms of spiritual rationale, there is a belief and from my experience, it’s true, that celibacy allows a priest to be focused on the work of the parish without concern of one’s family. I’d certainly welcome an ongoing discussion of this.

5) What is Canon Law and what are the origins for it? To what extent should the laity (non-clergy members of the Church) be concerned with regarding Canon Law?

Canon law is the law of the Church. Like any other institution, the Church needs rules and Canon Low provides that for us. It provides for many aspects of the Church’s internal make up. One of the reasons laity should be aware of it is because it does continue obligations and rights for the Christian faithful, which need to be assured. You can find a link to the entire body of text on the Vatican website, http://www.vatican.va/archive/ENG1104/_INDEX.HTM. You will want to pay special attention to the part on the obligations and rights of all the Christian Faithful, which is Part I of Book II.

Thanks Fr. Joe!!

March Madness- Catholic Style!

We are finally here. The week of the NCAA tournament. Right now, 68 teams have a shot at winning a National Championship but in the end, there will be just one winner. And if you are like a lot of people, you filled out bracket and know exactly who you will be cheering for in the coming weeks. Hopefully you have done your homework and will be successful.

There are several Catholic Universities who have punched their ticket to the big dance. Since we will be hearing a lot about their teams, their players, and their coaches, I thought it would be good to look at the holy Catholic men and women who these schools are named after. I not saying any of them are a lock to get past the first round but maybe this information can help you know more about these people who allowed the light of Christ to shine through them.

Xavier University (Cincinnati, OH)- St. Francis Xavier, born Francisco de Jasso y Azpilicueta (7 April 1506 – 3 December 1552) was a pioneering Catholic missionary born in the Kingdom of Navarre (Spain) and co-founder of the Society of Jesus. He was a student of Saint Ignatius of Loyola and one of the first seven Jesuits who dedicated themselves to the service of God at Montmartre in 1534. He led an extensive mission into Asia, mainly in the Portuguese Empire of the time. He was influential in the spreading and upkeep of Catholicism most notably in India, but also ventured into Japan, Borneo, the Moluccas, and other areas which had thus far not been visited by Christian missionaries. In these areas, being a pioneer and struggling to learn the local languages in the face of opposition, he had less success than he had enjoyed in India.

Gonzaga University (Spokane, Washington)- Saint Aloysius Gonzaga (March 9, 1568 – June 21, 1591) was an Italian Jesuit. (You'll find out that that Jesuit Universities tend to have good basketball teams!) He was born at his family's castle in Castiglione delle Stiviere, between Brescia and Mantova in northern Italy in what was then part of the Papal States. He was a member of the illustrious House of Gonzaga. In November 1585, Aloysius gave up all rights of inheritance when he became a priest and a Jesuit. Purity was his notable virtue; he never looked even upon his mother's face and never looked at his queen so that he could only recognize the queen by her voice. St. Maria Magdalena de Pazzi saw him in a vision in a great glory because he had lived a particularly strong interior life. Pope Benedict XIII declared him to the patron saint of young students in 1729. In 1926, he was named patron of Christian youth by Pope Pius XI. Owing to the manner of his death, he has always been considered a patron saint of plague victims.

Villanova University (Philadelphia, PA). St. Thomas of Villanova (1488 - September 8, 1555), was a preacher, ascetic, writer and Spanish friar of the Order of Saint Augustine. Thomas grew up and was educated in Villanueva de los Infantes, in the province of Ciudad Real, Spain, where his parents owned a prosperous estate; therefore the name Thomas of Villanueva. Part of the original house still stands, with a coat of arms in the corner, beside a family chapel. In spite of his family's wealth, as a young boy he often went about naked because he had given his clothing to the poor. Even though he studied Arts and Theology at the University of Alcalá de Henares and became a professor there, he decided to enter the Augustinian order in Salamanca in 1516, and in 1518 was ordained a priest. He was well known for his great personal austerity (he sold the straw mattress on which he slept in order to give money to the poor) and for his continual and untiring charitable efforts, especially towards orphans, poor women without a dowry, and the sick. He possessed, however, an intelligent notion of charity, so that while he was very charitable, he sought to obtain definitive and structural solutions to the problem of poverty; for example, giving work to the poor, thereby making his charity bear fruit. "Charity is not just giving, rather removing the need of those who receive charity and liberating them from it when possible," he wrote. In 1533, he sent out the first Augustinian friars to arrive in Mexico. He began to experience mystical ecstasies during Mass and when reading the psalms.

University of Notre Dame (South Bend, IN)- Mary, Mother of God. Okay, this is a big one! For the other schools, I'll admit, I used the internet to research some but this one I have a good base of knowledge on. "Notre Dame" is French for "Our Lady." The Virgin Mary was a young girl when the Angel Gabriel was sent from God to Nazareth to tell Mary, "Behold, you will conceive in womb and bear a son, and you shall name him Jesus." (Lk 1:31) I think you know the rest of the story. Often times, Protestants believe that Catholics worship Mary but that is not correct. We venerate her and ask her to intercede on our behalf. We also look to as an example of someone who said yes to God and was faithful enough to allow His will be done with her. Mary has been discussed in a couple of my post already and will be in the future. For more information on Mary, click here.

St. John's University (New York, NY). After extensive research, and even a call to the University's Campus Ministry office, I could not determine which St. John the University was named after (there are many "St. John's" in the Catholic Faith... St. John the Baptist, St. John of the Cross, St. John Neumann, and many more). What I was able to find out is that St. John's University was founded by the Vincentian Fathers. St. Vincent de Paul (1581-1660) was from southern France, Vincent pursued the priesthood as a way to assure a comfortable life. Through a profound conversion experience in his early ministry, Vincent unraveled a central paradox of life: it is in giving that one receives. In a Paris marked by great affluence enjoyed by a few as well as by dire poverty endured by the masses, Vincent discovered that one finds God and oneself in service to others. A man of deep faith, keen intellect, great business acumen and enormous creativity, he was at home in the hovels of the poor and in the palaces of royalty. Respected by the powerful and loved by the poor, Vincent bridged social classes through his works of charity and his advocacy for the disenfranchised. Vincent organized hospitals for the poor; founded asylums for the orphaned; opened workshops for the unemployed; championed literacy for the uneducated; advocated for the incarcerated; established local charities; and reformed the education and formation of the clergy throughout France where his community of priests and brothers undertook the spiritual care of the poor, particularly those in rural areas.

St. Peter's College (Jersey City, NJ)- St. Peter's College is yet another Jesuit institution. While I could not completely confirm, I believe that this school is named for Simon Peter, our first pope. St. Peter was the Apostle who denied Jesus three time times before Christ was crucified. However, God is merciful and still worked though St. Peter (which means 'Rock'). During his public ministry, Christ said, "You are Peter, and on this rock I will build my Church." (Mt 16: 18) Thus the Church of Christ was founded on St. Peter who later went to Rome and was killed for his belief in Jesus Christ. Simon... a simple fisherman would go on to be Saint Peter, our first Pope (a great fisher of men).

There are at least two other Catholic/Jesuit schools in the dance... Georgetown (based in Washington D.C.) and Marquette (Wisc.)

In no way am I claiming that all of those who are associated with these schools and their basketball teams are saintly 24/7 but it is worthwhile to learn about the lives of our Saints. They lived amazing lives and are in heaven now praying for us. You should get to know them!

Let the Madness begin!